Marybeth Hay said she just knew that the little girl they had named Amelia, who they in the process of adopting, was in that car. So as any excited parents might do in such a moment, the Hays ran to get their camera. Now both crying, they quickly returned to the lobby of Casa Grande to meet the foster mother, the interpreter, and most importantly, Amelia.
Marybeth, Craig, and Amelia spent the next week together. Hay said they simply "hung out'' at the hotel, living like a normal family. The only missing piece was Oscar, the Hays' nearly 3-yearold son, also adopted from Guatemala. He stayed back in Whitinsville with family because the Hays thought the trip would be too much for him. But for those several days in Guatemala, life seemed just typical. At one point, Craig even took a trip to the local Wal-Mart to pick up some baby supplies.
As they were wrapping up their visit to Amelia in Guatemala, three things happened in quick succession that left them feeling vulnerable and worried that Amelia's adoption could end up in jeopardy:
That was followed by the Guatemalan government issuing
statements on adoption deadlines and timeframes that suggested to some in the
adoption community that as of January 2008, incomplete adoptions were not guaranteed completion.
"It rips me apart and it is terrifying,'' Hay said. "At any give moment, statements come out that have the potential to impact my daughter's adoption.''
A deadline has long been looming for Guatemala to comply with an international treaty known as The Hague Convention that governs international adoption. The adoption community has expected that if Guatemala didn't meet this deadline, which is Dec. 31st, the country could be closed for new adoptions.
But the recent statements of both countries, combined with national news stories, made the adoption community wonder if any Guatemalan adoption in progress was ultimately safe.
At the start of 2007, when the Hays took initial steps to do a second adoption, concern about The Hague Convention deadline was already mounting. The Hays began working with Wide Horizons for Children Inc. in Waltham, which has handled the adoption of their son Oscar. According to Hay, Wide Horizons indicated the wait time could be considerable, given everything that was unfolding politically and the fact that the Hays wanted a girl.
Hay said that they became so concerned they might miss The Hague Convention deadline that they decided to go to a lesser-known placement agency in Louisiana, that indicated the Hays could adopt a baby girl in a shorter timeframe.
"Because of the impending Hague (deadline), I wanted to move as quickly as I could,'' Hay said. "The only reason I did this was because of The Hague.''
Looking back, Hay now wonders if that was the best choice. While the Louisiana agency has been adequate, Hays said it has not been as forthcoming with information as Wide Horizons was with Oscar's adoption. This has compounded the stress the family feels. In recent weeks, Hay said she has been putting many more demands on the agency and it is doing a better job responding to her.
Even so, they wait.
The Hays, along with hundreds of other American families, are moving forward with cautious optimism. Hay is grateful she wasn't caught up in the Casa Quivira nightmare, which has left many families still wondering the status of their pending adoption.
For now, the Hays' adoption is proceeding.
In October, they received a preapproval notice from the Guatemalan government, which means Amelia's case is under review. The next step will be notification that the case has been approved and the Hays will receive the so-called "pink slip,'' which means they can proceed to the next step, the second DNA test. (The government requires two DNA tests to ensure that no Guatemalan child has been abducted.)
It could be several weeks before those DNA results are in.
In a best-case scenario, the Hays could have Amelia home by the end of 2007.
What makes life more bearable for the Hay family is the occasional e-mails from Amelia's foster mother that update her on Amelia's progress.
One e-mail in mid-October told Hay that Amelia had just been seen by a doctor and is eating baby food. Plus, the 7-month old baby, who now weighs 17 pounds, has "popped two new teeth'' and is rolling over.
When her son Oscar asks about Amelia, Hay takes him into the living room, where the first picture of Amelia was framed and given a place of honor several months ago. A few times, the Hays have shown Oscar a map of the world and point to their home in the United States and slide their fingers down the map to the tiny country of Guatemala where Amelia is.
Also, Hay is taking on more of an advocacy role and has signed up with The Guatemalan 5000 Initiative, which was launched in September by the Joint Council on International Children's Services, an adoption advocacy group in Washington.
The Initiative calls for individuals and organizations to sign petitions, contact Congress and get out a "Call to Action'' so the United States will continue to put pressure on the Guatemalan government to ensure that the thousands of adoption cases currently in process are able to proceed without any new or additional requirements placed on them.
Hay has been distributing a petition and writing letters to government officials and news organizations. She even wrote an e-mail to Anderson Cooper, star of the CNN news show Anderson Cooper 360, to challenge a report on Casa Quivira story. Hays hasn't heard back from Cooper, but still insists that despite the Casa Quivira case, there are many reputable adoption foster homes and orphanages in Guatemala.
"This makes me feel like I am making a little dent,'' she added.
Hay took a quick trip to Guatemala for a "girls' weekend" with Amelia on Veteran's Day weekend. A friend of Hay's was planning a trip to Guatemala at that time for volunteer relief work. Hay was able to travel with the friend so she could spend some time with Amelia.
"She's the love of our lives,'' Hay said. "Oscar can't wait for his sister to arrive and neither can Craig and I."
Rosemary Cafasso is a Massachusetts-based freelance
writer. She has won national awards for her adoption coverage
for Bay State Parent magazine.
)
)